thedevonendeavor:

thatdudeemu:

punklucifer:

I scrolled hoping for a description and there wasn’t one

none is needed

Next level

(Source: benimdetamisimvardiya, via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)

d0gbl0g:

swagtron4000:

sorry sir, we don’t have the facilities for a cat scan, but we can certainly get you a lab report

heaheaheahahhahahahea

d0gbl0g:

swagtron4000:

sorry sir, we don’t have the facilities for a cat scan, but we can certainly get you a lab report

heaheaheahahhahahahea

(Source: bobasprite, via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)

amplitudeandexcursion:

there’s a DINOSAUR IN YOUR KITCHEN

amplitudeandexcursion:

there’s a DINOSAUR IN YOUR KITCHEN

(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via epic-humor)

cavityqueen:

my friend works in the grooming department at PetSmart and they just bought a bunch of puppy safe hair chaLK I AM DEAD

cavityqueen:

my friend works in the grooming department at PetSmart and they just bought a bunch of puppy safe hair chaLK I AM DEAD

(via epic-humor)

hotmesswithouthehot:

lemonmintcoughdrops:

the-grudge-girl:

I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day while I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in the corner of the subway station muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.
An overweight woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”
Wow, this man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?
Then a tall businessman went by and the man muttered, “Human.”
Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.
The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.  A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.” Cow? The man was much too skinny to be a cow. To me, he resembled a turkey or a chicken. A minute or so later, an obese man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.” Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.
That day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he as muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability. In Japan many people believe in reincarnation, so maybe he knows what these people were during a previous life. I observed the man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit”, “Onion”, “Sheep”, or “Tomato”.
One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on. As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said, “Bread.” I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability. The man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. It is an ability I obtained many years ago, but it’s not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”
“Then what is your ability?” I asked eagerly.
“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.
I laughed because I realized he was right. He said, “Bread.” The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.

HUMAN

HUMAN

hotmesswithouthehot:

lemonmintcoughdrops:

the-grudge-girl:

I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day while I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in the corner of the subway station muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.

An overweight woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”

Wow, this man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?

Then a tall businessman went by and the man muttered, “Human.”

Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.

The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.  A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.” Cow? The man was much too skinny to be a cow. To me, he resembled a turkey or a chicken. A minute or so later, an obese man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.” Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.

That day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he as muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability. In Japan many people believe in reincarnation, so maybe he knows what these people were during a previous life. I observed the man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit”, “Onion”, “Sheep”, or “Tomato”.

One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on. As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said, “Bread.” I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability. The man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. It is an ability I obtained many years ago, but it’s not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”

“Then what is your ability?” I asked eagerly.

“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.

I laughed because I realized he was right. He said, “Bread.” The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.

HUMAN

HUMAN

(via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)

itsanexperimentjohn:

theliteralmagpie:

aruf0nsu:

okay so imagine an au where the potters live. harry dates oliver wood briefly. james hears of this and pulls harry aside. stares him in the eye with a deadly serious face
“he’s a Keeper”

You made an entire AU that would alter almost every facet of that series
For a pun
You’re a beautiful person.

"Are you serious right now, Dad?"

"No, I’m not serious. I’m Dad. He’s Sirius."

(Source: rocketlynx, via healthyisbeaauty)

deniablesmiles:

the-ballad-of-peter-pettigrew:

(Sirius Black at 2am in the Gryffindor dormitory)

That description.

(Source: adrianivashkov, via eating-to-live-again)

andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:

headless-hat:

jupitereyed:

kkatkkrap:

justdrinktea:

so in Japanese, we sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.

here’s a general gist of the translation:

Rudolph had a shiny nose
no one liked him
he cried every night
then one Christmas it was dark
Santa decided Rudolph’s nose was convenient (literally it says convenient)
Rudolph was useful.

I SHIT YOU NOT. 

image

That’s basically the song without all of the fluff, though.

IT’S LIKE A VULCAN CHRISTMAS CAROL

image

I SPIT MY TEA ALL OVER THE KEYBOARD

(via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)

ravenclaw-queen:

In which Draco and Harry dress a little too quickly after a meeting

I don’t even ship it and this is awesome

(Source: scaredpotter, via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)

insert-phenomenal-url-here:

tffnyblws:

theyoungveinsvevo:

*does laundry but like in a punk way*

image

HOW THE FUCK IS THERE A GIF FOR THAT

(Source: ryanxross, via by-tea-i-mean-hot-lesbian-sex)